remember last time how much i crave for a rewind button in life? well, i still want one... to fix the decisions i've made that i regret until this freaking day... the decisions which changed my life indefinitely! the mistakes that i have done to ruin my life like this. now, not only a rewind button but a pause and play button as well... if possible, a stop button too. why? for when i'm tired, i will just hit the pause button and relax... do nothing and just chill and a play button for when i'm ready to rummage thru life again...
life is really hard to live with... but you can't live without it... ironic right? damn... with all the things happening around me, around us, around everyone... the non-stop rallying of the people to overthrow the government, the evat law which i think will bring more trouble to the masses, the hit-the-ceiling increase of gas prices, the dead business everywhere, the false promises given by politicians... i think Filipinos today take inflation as a very hot fad and not seriously as it should be... i mean, like our Philippine History "teacher" said awhile ago, as DLSU students, how can we prevent or at least minimize the problems of the country? that took a moment out of my time to stare into space and think about what i could do on the way home from DLSU. i guess even though i don't know anything that's going around in the Philippines or in the world, i still want to help... even though i have Chinese blood flowing within me, i guess nationalism to the Philippines in which i grew up in has been awaken not by the chaos happening... but by our last term kaspil prof, Dr. Dery. i guess all the articles about Rizal and the pre-colonial Filipinos have opened my eyes to act and to help out the country... PGMA said last night on the news, by 20 years from now, Philippines would have already paid it's debt and inflation will not be the in thing because the e-vat law has been approved... let's just see about that...
i guess my problems are just a tiny speck compared to the problem of the country, huh? but i'm still a kid... no, i'm not... even though how much i want to be a kid i've got face reality, i turned 18 last may already and am considered as an adult already... as a legal aged citizen... i need to be aware of what's happening... but me? no... i don't really want to know because the problems and workload i have everyday is enough to ruin every single thing in my life... because the more i listen to the news, the more irritated i become, the more i can't wait to leave the country... but i can't do that can i? i mean, i grew up here in the Philippines and could never and i mean never leave this country until everything is in good hands? i'm not really an activist, but i want to do something even though i don't want to...
ok, time out!
this is becoming to be a very nationalistic entry... back to the original subject... i want to have a pause button in life right now, lie on the grass somewhere high and look at the stars tonight... here in manila, i can't see any stars... maybe 2 or 3 only... why? because of the pollution!!! heck, please, i really want to get away from everything even just for tonight or just for a week... i want to get away from all the responsiblities i have to fulfill, i want to get away from my daily life... i just want to have a break and relax... i want to go to a spa to soothe my bones and relax my tired body... i just want to chill...
is it so much to ask for?! give me a break!!! please?!
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