message thread

yapo! been reading some message thread from my highschool e-groups... turns out, almost everyone has been sharing what they miss about the past... how fast is it? i mean, time... it felt that it was just yesterday that we graduated and not a month have pass us by and we were already missing each other... all reunion attempts are just a fantasy... but guess what, even though we don't see each other much, we're still the same... well, most of us anyway...

everytime i opened my e-mail, i can see dozens of messages from our e-groups... unlike other e-groups, i just don't have the heart to just erase every message without reading them... guess what, even though i haven't been posting any messages there, i really miss those guys... every single one of them. as i have said before, even though i'm in dlsu and i know i'm supposed to be happier in my college life, i still think that i have just left the most important part of my life behind... sjcs... my alma mater. and i can't do anything about it though... everybody must move on and this is just one thing... later on in life, we must leave everything behind in order to find our meaning, our purpose...

i guess highschool is still haunting me til this day. and i don't hate it... i can't blame it. highschool has been memorable to me... all the things that i have learned... and trust me, it's those highschool friends who continue to teach me the lessons in life that i must learn in order to mature! they are the ones who taught me how to laugh, to smile, to enjoy life and to cry, to be sad and to be alone... i found what i love to do in highschool... someone drove me to learn how to crochet when i was in third year, to continue on baking when i was in fourth year, to be creative all through out and to write down my feelings... i thank those guys who contantly reminded me that i will never be alone because they are not simply acquaintances but my friends... i thank those whom comforted me when i am so lost and who listened to me even though i am crying... and to those who gave me happiness and a reason to live... simply, my friends!

i guess i am sappy again... right? oh well... all those threaded message must have caught me off guard... oh well... but in reality, everytime i enter sjcs or even just the malacanang compound, all i really feel right now are painful memories in which i thought would be happy memories for the rest of my life... everytime i stand as the ycaza and jp laurel intersection... at the ycaza and uli-uli intersection... at the former zashi, which is now quickee... all memories just enters without asking for my permission... really, i just want to forget everything right now... just like that... but then, bola and the rest said that amnesia will never be the answer... because it's not only the memories i would like to lose will be gone but the lessons that i have learn from them and my friends... and i may repeat the same mistake all over again if ever that happens...

to love is something wrong... that's why i'm sorry...